The School of Life

We all know what school is like.  We all got into its formal process of training and formation.  What I am talking about in here is not the latter.  I am pointing to the "freelance" training and formation with life...that is what I call in here "The School of Life".

This is such an ambitious venture to deal with in writing.  But as I conversed with my husband a while ago, my mouth just led me to the title above and thought perhaps I could give it a try in writing.

So what do I mean with the terms "School of Life?

Life in this context is where we are.  The life that we live each day presents and gathers lessons.  Only those with "sharp" visions would be able to see the non formal and freelance programming that it presents.

Why did I arrive to the above title?  While I started cleaning up the mess in the house, my thoughts ran back to the challenges that my family had in the last 2 months.  And I was trying to recall to my husband how we both asked God in prayer  that we would become good parents and that we would be strengthened in faith.  God answered our prayers by throwing us to the situations that would sharpen our skills such as the coming of our daughter and her coming at a much earlier date (premature).

Moreover, I could recall a prayer session with a group of workplace colleagues.  I shared to them my a reflection stating that I have requested God so many things in prayer and I realized how fast He was with responding to them.  Well,  I did not really get exactly  what I requested instead He threw me to challenging situations that led to the formation of my character and values. 

I may not have gotten everything that I wanted but in the end I found wisdom that led to asking for the right things over and above material possessions.    In the process also, I realized I did not really need a lot of what I first asked.  

Though at times also I got what I wanted, a lot of times I realized I did not really needed them as much as I desired them at first.  The most of the imprint were the wisdom and growth I gathered from them.  Materials possessions became what I called  “my bonus”.  Ultimately also, having those material possession led to another good value -  giving them away:-).  Thus, one good thing led to another good.  That is something very beautiful ha:-)

There are more things to learn.  Basic to learning also that I needed to put on as my gear is openness.  That’s what is needed to maximize learning in this that I call “The School of life”.  Huuh… tedious training and formation but I really reaped a good harvest from it.  The formation is very unique.  The program is so fitted to each one (hmmm I think formal schooling has slowly adapted the same:-) ...)

So...join and hop in my "school",...and be truly …formed:-)
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Guide Questions for the Readers to comment on?

1.  Has there been any situation that made you learn from this "school of life?
2.  Is there any part of this article that perked you a bit?

Please share your comments... you might be able to enlighten me as well:-) Thank you very much.  Be blessed :-) 

The New Mom and Wife's Heart

For almost two weeks now, I have kept my heart so close to myself.  My heart right now is my family – husband and baby and the home we keep and try to move into the direction that it should go.  It is kind of overwhelming lately.  My small world has become bigger.  I realize that a wife and mother can do so much at sharing herself to her family. 

Everyday, I seem to be so separate from the world outside of me.  Despite of that I feel that I have built an intense moment with where I am.  Every thing that I do seems to give shape to loving.  I don’t count nor be conscious with how time flies so fast in a day.   

One time my own sister has even teased and checked on me as to how I feel about not having much time to spend outside of the house or go to the mall and do the usual leisure / pleasurable stuffs that I love doing such as eat, watch movie, stay in a corner of a café  and read a good book or surf the net.  Hhmmm as I write this things I seem to have missed them all but nothing is more beautiful than nurturing a fragile human being nor be a man’s partner in the building up of a home. 

But you see I did respond to my sister by saying “I have done so many things as a single person… ( and even went outside of the country to really satisfy my own fancy – that I thought)  but where I am right now (despite the physical tiredness…hehe not really fatigue) is more meaningful to me. 

I have never found such treasure in my entire life than what I have right now.  Thank You Dear God:-)

From a Neophyte Leader

grabbed from : linked2leadership.com

I had a beautiful phone conversation with Mike this morning. He stressed the difference between two types of employees. One is an average guy in terms of intelligence and skills. He just got in the the company fresh from a four-year course in college. Feeling the lack of experience, he maintains an open disposition. In fact, he considers every encounter in the workplace as a learning experience. Other than that also, he values relationship with people in the workplace side by side with learning the job.

The second guy is highly skilled, intelligent and has enough experience to make him thrive in his work in the company. Sadly, he has gone as far as overvaluing his capacities that he has closed himself to learning. Not only that, because of the drive to get to the top, he disregards people and relationships to get his way up.

Mike stressed further that, no matter how knowledgeable and intelligent one may be without virtues would fail him to complete the entire package of a successful employee in an organization.

Someone once told me that IQ (Intelligent Quotient)would make one get the job, EQ (Emotional Quotient / Intelligence) will make him thrive in the job and AQ (Adversity Quotient) will get him (amidst the turbulent water of competition and organizational politics) to the top of the job (he gets promoted).

True enough, one of the major exams that job applicants take is mental ability test or IQ. Lots of companies also include in the package Emotional intelligence exam. I have not really seen an AQ standardized exam yet, the results of these exams provide a very important feedback for management in hiring an employee.

What's my point in tackling this? i have such a challenging situation at work related to the kinds of employees i described above. I can call it a real problem to deal with and i felt that I fell short of anticipation for the future regarding previous decisions I made on hiring employees.

I would say at this time that it is with the second type of employee that i described above that I had the most difficulty dealing with. You know why? This employee can be too ambitious disregarding company policies by digging underground while creating a beautiful front. I tell you, this employee can ruin an entire department through intrigues and malicious talks.

Imagine many of this kind of employee...simple lang...well the organization will rot if not squarely attended with. Sometimes they have the art of telling you that they are not aware and tales of lies will be accounted by them to cover up and appear clean and manipulate others to the level of emotions...hehehe i always remind myself to focus on the behavior so that i could deal with kind objectively.

Lastly, I have just been a victim...verrrrrrrrry painful...I am a neophyte leader...I learned the hardest way...I just gave my trust and it led to betrayal...but the experience won't stop me from trusting...:-) I just need to be smarter the next time around...

At this point...i have a special note for the younger ones (naks tanda ko na)...just go slow...learn as much as you can...there is no hurry...if you want to get to the top... learn as many basics skills at the bottom. Learn the beautiful art of Emotional Intelligence. Be sincere and honest with your dealings and more than anything...even if you have learned many things...it is still good to be humble.

Mike told me the art of scientists. If they want to gain knowledge and wisdom they EMPTY their minds and hearts...they claim they know nothing...and so in this realm, they discover the wonder of not knowing through the bountiful revelations and unlimited supply of that knowledge (hehe baka pupunta na ako sa topics ng science stop na muna hahahahha).

Young ones...pakiusap lang...let's keep our feet flat on the ground if not... the most the we can do ...Let's bend and embrace humility...and don't forget hahhhaha God honors the older ones just like the way He honors you.... I promise you...you will see more of what you are looking for ...:-)

Lastly, I am a neophyte leader and i am painfully relating this ...from my OUCH!!! experience.

Neophyte Parents

  
New parents…the neophytes.  That’s I and my husband Mike.  We are into the earliest stage of parenthood when our baby Maria Mikaela was born on July 28, 2012.  It left us with the greatest challenge in taking care of our baby such that she was born premature and had to mature (particularly her lungs) in an incubator. 

What does neophyte parenting mean for us? It means having to deal with the following :

1.     It means having to deal with a new member in the house.

I and my husband definitely prepared for her coming.  The moment we had our daughter in the house, our mind and heart are disposed to having her as a “permanent” member of the family.  Though from time to time we got to recall how a year before she was born, we were both so crazy preparing for our wedding, we just feel so blessed that in less than a year after that she “came”  with a surprising “entrance” into this world (at 7.5 months from age of my gestation.  Brave girl ha…).

2.    It means having to prepare  a lot of things for her

Eight days before she was born, we decided to buy her clothes, stroller and many other things that she would need aside from those given by my husband’s sister and brother.  I also have to make room for a closet for her.  We felt the excitement of the preparation as for the first time, we celebrate that grand entrance of our little girl.

3.    It means having to adjust with our schedules  

Since we have been having difficulty finding a nanny (we had one  and we simply decided to let her go on serous grounds), I and Mike have to bear with changing our schedules at home.  When we took our daughter out from the hospital, part of the instructions would be to feed her every three hours.  So that would mean some late night, midnight and dawn feeding which we both do on different shifts so as not to physically exhaust ourselves.  Even going to Church together has been adjusted such that each of us goes on different schedules for now. 

4.     It means having to  deal with new tasks at home

We had to deal with many new tasks such as feeding Mika every three hours, changing her diaper, fixing her bed, bathing her in the morning, washing her clothes, making sure she is up to her vitamins, regularly buy her supplies (milk, diaper, etc.) and a lot of the little things we do for her (this is what you call, the "unlimited" part heheheh).

5.    It means a real training and taming of character

As parents we are both so aware of the physical fatigue and tiredness that we experience everyday since Mikaela came.  There were times when we are both caught in a middle of so many things to do that I realize all of them are on top priority ( I never thought  such tightness could really happen). From this at times, we get throw some “tight” words also from where we realize later we have come to reach the peak of our tiredness already.  Good thing we are both conscious of ourselves that we immediately talk about it. We get to remind each other  that taking care of Mikaela should not be a burden but an expression of our love as parents without forgetting each other in the process. 

When we land in bed both tired and exhausted, I feel the grace of still finding humor with what happened during the day and bring everything up to prayer …all in thanksgiving and gratefulness to God for giving us the gift of a child.

6.     It means having to deal with additional daily expenses

As a couple we had our own ”comfort zones”  as to spending.  We have experienced a very lose budget that we could have some extras to spend for our personal stuffs.  Now we are learning to give them up for “someone new” in the house …our daughter Maria Mikaela.  Though expenses went as far as the ceiling…or shall I say beyond the ceiling (hahahah and up the sky) since we had to cope with the high bills first and foremost at the hospital,  I feel not being deprived of materials things.  There is such a big difference with generosity.  You give up something for love and you gain everything with joy and hope for someone you dearly love.

I guess there would be more challenges to come for us new parents and that would mean taking one small step at a time.  I and my husband both learned from  planning too much that did not really end up as expected.  We are both learning in faith and submission to a God that holds each time of the day.  Thus, we can only do what is at hand.  Do the initial planning, present them to God in prayer and “listen” for His leading.

Being new in the “business” to parenting makes both of us – I and my husband – realize that this is lifelong…tedious … yet in the name of love…not one of these can hinder our hearts from fulfilling our calling …as parents…no fear at all.

 Prayer :  Thank you God for the opportunity to serve you through one life you share with us.  Amen.