Wednesday, May 21, 2014

Simplify...Simplify...And Refocus




Why the repetition of the title?  That is a cry from inside.  That is my greatest desire at this time.  I have so many things to do...being a wife (hmmm most neglected part...forgive me hon), mom (consumes most of my day), work (summer is almost ending and we are asked to report to work to do some cleaning and planning in school), my comprehensive exam in my post graduates studies which will happen this weekend and the following week and the writing of the dissertation research soon with perhaps some teaching load in the graduate school.  

Am I crazy? hmmm crazier? I feel choked at times.  We don't have anyone to assist us in the house and now I am doing so many things at the same time.  I remember one time when i fed my daughter, i just allowed myself to cry while she was watching her ABCD and number videos.  She might have felt my sobs in between  that she checked on me and gave me that cute grin while i stopped my sobbed and dramatically changed my facial expression into a huge grin as if nothing happened.  

I told my husband about it after that.  And i just told him that i just wanted to cry to ease out that emptiness and tiredness that i felt. within.  

While writing this, i am in the middle of the great plunge of digging my notes for my comprehensive exam.  But since writing is theraphy for me, i hop from my notes to writing.  And it SIMPLY made me relaxed...

Why am I into these things? I really trim down my engagements.  Perhaps i could postpone dissertation or just write slowly while i enjoy the greatest part of my joy and happiness...MY FAMILY.  I love my family so much.  When things get complicated, i could always trace my eyes to that part of my life that gives a lot of meaning to what i am doing at the moment.  A great inspiration at that.  I could value less the others, desire to simplify and do something about it because i have a family to take care of.  I want my heart to refocus.  And that all others in my life are just decors.  They don't really define me.  I am just me...and I have a family to go home to.  That is what I am thanking God for at the moment:-)

Dealing with My Child's Tantrums and the Different "Varieties" of Crying


google.com temper tantrum photos


I and my husband are not experts in handling the topic.  When I gave a parenting seminar, one of the questions was on dealing with tantrums.  It was so easy for me to answer that time since, it was just all readings and sharings from others such as the word...IGNORE.  

Now that our daughter Maria Mikaela has reached the stage approaching toddlerhood, she displayed some bouts of it especially during meal times or teething discomforts.  What did i do when this occurs.

I rambled too inside.  I panicked. I did not like seeing her in pain or experiencing discomforts.  Of course as a mom, i want to see my daughter well, smiling, giggling, posing her charming grin and giving me that wonderful hugs and pat on my back.  But then, she just went wild with her wailing.  When i learned and told myself not to panic, i had to observe and sense what was the discomfort all about.  I would check her diaper, temperature and if she was hungry.  If it's about teething, then i would place a gum jell to ease her pain.    If she's full, mothers can sense the difference among different tempo and pitches of the cry.  I can.  That's the wonder of it.  Thank you God.

I would start to observe manipulation when she cries and then checks on my reaction from time to time.  If she senses my panic she makes it much louder.  Oh smart girl.  I won't do anything with that.  Most of the time she stops. 

When I feel that she has been awake for much longer time, then it must be that she's sleepy so i put her to bed.  But when it is a cry of pain, even if i put her to bed she still continues to cry and so i find a way to check which is the cause or what caused her pain.

Oh mothers...mothers have gifts at sensing these things.  I feel that tantrums and other varieties of crying can be dealt with accordingly if "use" we mothers will use our "extra" sensing power. Again thank you God.

With our daughter...hhmmm i and my husband have lost our patience several times.  We did not want her hurt herself.  We explain to her that it pains us to see her in pain.  Even if in her young age she might not understand the entire conversation, we just want to communicate to her that she is loved. 

Ohh I feel that our little girl is smart.  I feel that she is listening yet she is just so "gifted" with some of those strategies that may manipulate us.  Though a lot of times, I find it cute but she can't be reinforced and pursue with such behavior.

Tough times....great learning for new parents like me and my husband.  Still there is a lot of rejoicing to being a parent.  A piece by piece to learn each single day despite this challenge.  Thank you God ...Amen.

MOTHERS’ DAY - MY LOVELY DATES and MORE:-)




May 11, 2014…mother’s day…I was at first not so motivated to go out of the house not until there was the brown out.   Hmmm we had to do something.  I and my husband decided to hear mass at the mall after which we can bring our daughter to a play house where we could roam around and play with her. 

It was kind of tough though bending our bodies and go through some passage only fitted for kids.  But still we had to accompany our daughter.  We alternated roles.  I go up with Mikaela while her dad stays down and catches her.  We did slides, rode cars, threw balls and we allowed her to explore her way and check toys which she may find new to her eyes.  She was so curious and wanted to explore more.  Yet we had to limit her time. That was her first time in that huge play room. 

From the play room, we paced through a Japanese restaurant and ate our early lunch so that we could bring Mikaela home for her solid food lunch.  We brought her milk though for an initial intake.  She cant starve while we ate our lunch.  It may be a big discomfort for all of us.

I was just so glad, everything went well.  All of us had fun yet I sensed my husband profusely sweating in the playroom for lack of airconditioner.  Yet I saw how happy he was observing our daughter tracing her steps everywhere. 

Looking at my dates – my husband Michael and MiIkaela made me feel how God has provided has so well.  I feel so blessed with having a husband that’s really a great partner in everything while I saw my daughter fulfilling such a great desire of a mom.  She is such a gift…a beautiful gift to us.  She is  the greatest symbol of God’s generosity in our life as a couple.  She taught me everything about valuing life, formation of our character as a couple including guarding our own actions / behavior for they may negatively influence her.  Things are not perfected though yet, as a mother, it is a uphill downhill and up again.  The most important thing is I never stop myself from learning despite the many flaws and faults.

Thank you God for making me a wife.  Thank you for making me a mother.  Thank you God for making things happen for me, for making me a mother to your beautiful angel by the name of MARIA MIKAELA.

HAPPY MOTHERS’ DAY TO ME….AND TO ALL MOTHERS IN THE WORLD:-)