Creating and Re-Creating Everyday

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After I wrote a blog 2 weeks after my wedding, it has now been more than 2 months since that big day. There are lots of things to share such as those moments of adjustments. This can be my moment to offer ...

Tracing the steps back ...2 months ago, we spent few days together without work and him not going back to the province. Few days together were like friendship and love combined in one nest. We had so much fun and laughter and found out some of our odd characters.

First I had to help him with bringing all his stuffs (oh so many) to our new home. When I went to his apartment, I was shocked with all the mess and thought ..."oh I am gonna be living with a man now". True enough, Mike has his own ways of thinking what might be clean and not clean (hahahhahah).

At my end, I always see a sense of urgency in terms of cleanliness. For him "it is just fine for now" but he does the cleaning, too, with me (he is my partner in this). He was adjusting with my with my odd character of not being able to sleep at night with mess all around us. Hehe.... he does help me in the cleaning and felt the comfort of the night breathing the freshest air of our home (combined with very relaxed mood).

While I ask someone to do my laundry every weekend, he does it everyday which at first made me crazy with my comments like "why are you tiring yourself doing that everyday...or you may be wasting too much laundry powder"...etc. But then I learned my lesson during weekends when I see him so relaxed with not attending with lots of dirty clothes (good thing I have someone so dedicated to do that for me but I told him the help is for both of us now:-).

Partnership is very much part of us. We agree on chores so we can relax together. There are times for sharing what has transpired during the day although at times Mike was like irritated when I was browsing the internet during dinner or breakfast time. And the new rule was made...no computer or cellphone when dining.

Mike is smart and has very logical mind. While I share emotional stories and drama of my day and I could go mesh mash and hudge pudge of everything. He can make me focus on the main content and so I would ..."oh is that what I actually said?" (although at times I would still argue on my point hahahhaha). He is such a talent in terms of summarizing my long everrrr stories.

While I go back with stories on previous days... on some things that really excited me, he can remind me "hon you have repeated that a lot of times already". But then I would insist telling him that "honey... it is just so me to share it over and over again". Fine ..and oh so fine, he does understand me...including my manner of repeating over and over again how we met, how he courted me, how we survived in the relationship and many more. But another rule is not to repeat issues that has been dealt and handled with unless we make reference to it to deal with new issues.

We do say "sorry" a lot. There were moments of silence. At my end, I allowed to make it longer sometimes but the "longer" or length is as much as 2 hours intervened by sleep at night and the morning that followed became unbearable. I made my move to say that magic "sorry". And all I can say related to this is that, I have a husband that does not need that touch of "himas" or "lambing". His is always a willing heart. And so I realized I was the one that kept it long and made it more painful for both of us from a very simple cause of argument.

And so the next rule was born...not to allow that deafening silence to occur. We just have to talk and allow each other to express how we feel over the situation. After which we can just let it pass and move on. For that we decided to really forgive. From that also, we always reap the grace from each moment...without grudge from where we came from. We just move on :-)

I highly respect my husband also. You see I have this attitude of insisting my side and a lot of times when he sees the good sense of it, he gives in. But then I have the tendency to forget to listen from his wisdom and opinions. From my husband's comments (hon, you don't always get what you want or i do have my opinions, too. I am not going to spoil you in that)...toinks.... I learned to submit.

Well Mike adjusted with me and my dog, too. He likes dogs but he finds me spoiling Tobby. While I was tolerant with my dog sleeping in the house, he did not like it that way. And so I submitted to him training my dog while I intervened from time to time. I saw how the progress of such "training" for example with feeding time. Tobby is choosy with food. But then my husband technically tries to feed him late in the morning and voila...all food eaten and my dog gained weight (wow...did not know that technique ha).

The rule to pray together is our bond every morning and night. And from where did we get such idea? Experience again (hehehhehe). There were mornings when I got used to praying alone and realized "why not pray together". And so we would have our praying together at breakfast. We say our thanksgiving about everything even for those that " have not come yet (we say our prayer holding our hands together), as if they are there already (great faith ha).

At night, when we are tempted to face our gadgets - computers and do things until 10 to 11 pm led us to realize also that prayer has been set aside and so the next rule was made...that is to pray together immediately after dinner. And so we could wash plates and clean up ...after which we could surf the net, read books or talk and talk. The point is...to pray first before doing anything or before we land in bed.

Really, there is great wisdom with how God brought a man and a woman together to live as husband and wife. It is a partnership blessed by Him. The graces that He dispensed in that sacred ceremony is a grace to bear witness and become His image to each other.

Lastly, I have lots of male friends. My husband knows that I am very friendly and so crazy with stories and laughter. I personally made my rule...hahah to continue to be friendly but tell my stories and my special and most intimate stories only to my husband before my writings or anyone else.

While I laugh and laugh with male and female friends, I always remind myself that any concerns and challenges of my married life are kept sacred in the four corners of our little rented nook discussed, dealt and celebrated with my beautiful husband, my lover and best friend.

So grateful to God for such a wonderful gift of a man :-) with hop and hop and shouts for joy. Amen:-)